Seriously, It’s Just A Phone

Martin · 15 years (9:23 AM · Jul 11, 2008)

Driving to work today, I only passed by one Cingular store, but I could see a small throng of people standing outside of it, waiting for it to open. Listening to the radio, I heard that the frenzy had reached a higher pitch in the bay area, where some people have been waiting outside of Apple stores since Wednesday, and lines have extended to span almost a block of city streets.

What earth-shattering, ground-breaking, head-exploding new product are all these sad souls waking up early for?

The iPhone 3G, of course. A slight upgrade to the iPhone.

As a somewhat frequent visitor of Digg during the work week, I'm actually quite sick of hearing about it, if you want to know the truth. Almost every other story submitted has been about the iPhone 3G, and each one seems to try to make something as mundane into something interesting more so than the last, and not coincidentally, insult my intelligence more.

Want to watch someone activate their iPhone?

Or navigate an application store?

Or take it out of the bloody box, and handle it?

All covered, courtesy of fanboys, Engadget, and the piece of trash that is Gizmodo. And it makes me sick. How pathetic has our society become that we waste minutes and hours of our lives standing in line for an upgraded telephone?

It's gotten to the point where I feel like I'm about the only man in his mid 20's in California who doesn't shit himself every time someone mentions the iPhone - a sad reality. I even had the displeasure of listening to KGO interview a guy who was first in line at one of the Apple stores in San Francisco, who admitted he already had an iPhone, but wanted a second version phone as well.

Yes, in this time of economic downturn, people are buying a second version of the same phone they already own because it has a few more features than the last. At the time of this writing, Apple's stock is down 1.9% - on a big product launch day, no less - and people are still casting away their barely-year-old old iPhones so they can browse the internet on it slightly faster. And people wonder why our economy is tanking.

This foolishness must stop. Currently, I'm using an LG Chocolate 2, and I really like it - it's easily the best phone I've ever owned. It does everything I need it to do, and it looks cool. But I am not going to rush out and buy the LG Chocolate 3 when they release it, especially not if my current phone is working fine. In fact, the next time I buy a phone will likely be when this one stops working. And I'm not going to participate in the ridiculous douchebaggery that permeates the iPhone crowd, and take videos of myself opening the box, using the phone, or buying applications. I'm a tech guy, and even I find this crap completely neurotic, obsessive, and just plain disgusting.

It's a phone, people. Get over it.

11 Comments

  • xot says:

    iCaramba! Wot a scorcher … and still a really nice bit of kit. A friend was showing me an iPod Touch today, the first time I’ve been up close to this tech, if only for a few minutes. I thought it was pretty damn nifty. $300 nifty? That may be a stretch, I don’t really need any iJewelry. But as a software delivery playform? Count me in.

  • Hehe, well I won’t say that the device isn’t a neat one. I don’t find them quite as innovative as a lot of people do (it’s essentially the same as any other phone, just with a software candy coating), but I can recognize an interesting software delivery platform when I see one. I’ve played around with the original iPhone a bit, and it’s neat, but like you mention above, not necessarily worth the price of admission.

    I think the media hype is disproportionate to the actual sales figures though, and that’s why I think it’s a bit silly to focus on the device as, what some people say, the third big handheld game development platform. Admittedly, there are a lot of cool applications you can make that utilize the touch screen and accelerometer… and the GPS and music capabilities as well. But until more people start using them, it just doesn’t seem viable to me.

  • CoolGamrSms says:

    I think all the hype over the iPhone is nuts. Seriously, people need to go find better things to do. I could see waiting outside a store for an hour or two to get maybe a 360, a Wii or a PS3 (Even those are junk, but that’s another topic), when they first came out, but a phone? That’s just crazy. I also like my Chocolate 2, although it needs to be a little more durable in my opinion. I cracked the LCD once, and had to pay $50 to replace it. I’m with you on this one…

  • Leif902 says:

    I completely agree; the iPhone’s are neat devices, but I’m just happy with the cheap Nokia that I’ll probably have for years before it finally dies. Waiting outside for a week for anything is a complete waste of life (though admittedly, waiting for football tickets is always a lot of fun, even though I could get cheap ones on game-day; Go Yellow Jackets!)

  • Soleil says:

    As a typical silicon valley geek, I have access to people in high (relatively) places. Namely, Apple techies with free iPhones the day of release. I played with it a little at a karaoke party (after I brought down the house with “Krytonite” …), and thought it was neat. Smooth graphics, smooth touch interface, smooth shell.

    Yet here I am, still using my $30 Nokia brick with no internet and no camera. No complaints.

    Apple products are almost all the same. They work great for a few things, and look sexy doing it. But they’re not very versatile and don’t *do* a whole lot.

  • Great article, I totally agree. I mean, its just a phone! And seriously, whats with the crazy pricing? The iPod Touch is like 3 times cheaper then the iPhone, and all the iPhone has that the Touch doesn’t is a camera and you can call people. Seriously…that’s something my sister’s phone she got for $19 can do.

    Secondly, the plans are outrageous, in New Zealand, 2 year plans start from as “little” as $8000. Ouch.

  • tuntis says:

    No thank you, I’ll stay with my trustable Nokia 6600.

    Which reboots half the time I try to call somebody, crashes when using built-in applications and is the slowest phone I’ve ever used…

  • Yourself says:

    Let’s hear it for materialism!

  • darkshado says:

    I’m with you on this one an I really can’t see why its getting all this attention when really its just a touch sensitive phone with wifi (which btw is pretty useless if you don’t live in a city).

  • BenRK says:

    I’m a “little” late on this one, but I have to agree with you. It is just a phone that’s shiny. Of course, there’s the classic “I like shiny” which is sadly true in today’s world, as far as I can tell.

    I go as far as saying we don’t really need cell phones. Sure it’s nice to talk on the go with people, but, in the end, do you really need it? I don’t have a cell phone, and when I “need” to call home to get a ride home (I only just got a car, and I STILL can’t afford it), I either bring the family cell phone, or just borrow someone elses cell phone.

    Though I have been tempted to use my DS as a VoIP Phone (which is possible), but I’ve looked at the services, and let’s just say I don’t think it’s worth it. And on that note, I need to buy a new DS, but just because my 3 year old DS’ top screen is all but dead, and the touch screen is acting up more so then usual. When the Lites came out, I didn’t rush out to buy one, and I’m only getting a new one now because my old one is all but dead. In the mean time, I’ll just use the family DS lite, which only my youngest sister uses anyway, and even then, not that often.

  • CoolGamrSms says:

    Hahaha, I just saw an iPhone ad on the side of your site. Pwned!

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